Eternal love was never enough for me. I turned around and I was naked in the mirror, I couldn't take the shame. I fell to the tile and cursed that name. I thought you carried me on eagle's wings but my body was just kindling for a fire that didn't burn for much of anything. Exiled from the home I thought I had- Lazarus wished he had stayed dead. Adam and Eve went walking out in the dawn. They spotted the black death make its way through town, knocking all the castles down. This water's gone sour, child. We're leaving this land for awhile. Our fledgling minds immune to grace turn in revile from this place.

Your wedding dress still fresh in the closet, boxes left unpacked. Cottage far from the god of the west, far off the route we mapped. Toss the shovels and the crates in the my truck- we drive to town at sunrise. Farmer's market in that parking lot- cabbage, grapes, and rice. Wait- I've never been near anyone in this place. I never touched anyone. Wait- I've never been near anyone in this place. I never touched anyone but there's something so familiar as the mountains grow beneath our feet. Raking piles of leaves in the yard, Church service at dark. Take a walk back from where we came- I left my hat in the park. You look like a shaman in the green sweater, bare feet on the dash. Distance slowly diminishes now, wood in the hearth and ash. Then you turn away as the fire starts to burn. I put my hand on your arm and I try to calm the nerves. "Everyone feels like this- this is nothing to be alarmed of." But you say, "No one's ever felt like this, we are the first ones on the Earth." Wait- I've never been near anyone in this place. I never touched anyone. Wait- I've never been near anyone in this place. I never touched anyone but there's something so familiar as the mountains grow beneath our feet.

When the dust settles clear and I see her standing there I'm overwrought with joy and cannot speak. I find myself humming songs 'neath my breath in the rush- as the day unfolds I still hold unto something. But when I get struck by some panic or get stuck on the violent tides and plagues that all could be... Oh I feel her hand inside my palm and my heart slows down to a calm. Every day I fall a little more- just a little more. Like the rock to the sea, she bore so much for me. So much that any other would have fled. She kissed my ears and tuned out all the babbling of cruel mouths. Only harmonies grace the stage of my senses. And the sphere seems to stop on its axis when we talk. A cosmic bliss, a starfish in the sand... Oh I breathe her name in morning hymns, surrounding to lover's whims. Every day I fall a little more- just a little more. So here and there, words drift through the air- words our lips have never known before. She casts them 'round, conjures ghosts and sounds. She ropes my knees and tortures my desires. I've always been the kind to practice care and pay mind. I've been too scared of driving off the edge... Oh no, this time I'm running blind and free. We're skipping through eternity. I'm your captive- launch me to the sea, babe. To the sea.

And the rain comes down like hickory dickory dock, riot in the mind stirring. All the dancers swirl around like hickory dickory dock, colors in the cauldron burning. Lady at piano, Frere Jacques on the violin- the attic band starts the song. I put a nickel in the juke and I'm stirring up a wild din. The maesuolum comes alive again. Tick-tick whoa Smoke rises from the ice cream cone And the rain comes down like hickory dickory dock, riot in the mind stirring. All the dancers swirl around like hickory dickory dock, colors in the cauldron burning. Cathedral mice in excitement tiptoe past the maestro's hands that sweep 'round fast. I'm at the inn, the parade goes on, I'm in my hunting coat. The village decked out a cornflower float. Tick-tick whoa Smoke rises from the ice cream cone And the rain comes down like hickory dickory dock, riot in the mind stirring. All the dancers swirl around like hickory dickory dock, colors in the cauldron burning. This song goes out to the skylark- I saw it once on an evening walk. As long as I see it in the sky, I'll never be lonely again.

What can a man do to deserve a heartache like a bullet wound? But toss ill-conceived affection down a hundred rabbit holes. And how can a girl ever deserve the cruel poetry of bitter words? I erase myself. And I'm gone. Till it's all a passing mood. Enter the world of a man without a spring- a heart left untouched despite everything. I loved you and I'm sorry that our dreams remained in two. Two separate once again, separate in the end. When the rooster crows the sun will come up and I'll smile to myself 'cuz I knew once the light he shares, the light with which he taunts me now. The altar of my heart stands bare again. I shudder to think of when I loved her then. I'm a broken chair that she left on a street curb in the rain. Enter the world of a man without a spring- a heart left untouched despite everything. I loved you and I'm sorry that our dreams remained in two. Two separate once again, separate in the end. You can pack adoration like porcelain in each kiss and still leave numb thy lovers lips. I wish I'd know this fate . . . this untouchedness . . . before I dealt my hand.

A feather falls down from the nest- gravity does as it does, it's resigned to descend. So do I trip from the circus wire- ship in the bottle 'neath the flame of the sculptor's fire. That night we were sippin' on this, playin' on that in the billiard room. Lying in bed, hearing it all like a babe in His arms. Stupidhead, leavened bread, a hundred salmon swim past my face. I count them all as I tread the waters of my heart alone in bed. Sippin' on this, playin' on that in the billiard room. Lying in bed, hearing it all like a babe in His arms. Pebblemouth, sniffin' hound, rainbow river beyond the clouds. Thrashing in, jumping 'round the dark blue light of lily gown. Jumpin' the train, ridin' the line in the billiard room. Flat on my back, asleep in the snow, swaddled in His arms. Pebblemouth, sniffin' hound, rainbow river beyond the clouds. Thrashing in, jumping 'round the dark blue light of lily gown. Jumpin' the train, ridin' the line in the billiard room. Flat on my back, asleep in the snow, swaddled in His arms. And I count them all as I tread a hundred salmon swam past my face.

I heard he got a job painting fences at a site on Levi Street. We used to be the best of friends way back then, skipping stones and comping changes. We used to drive up north and honky tonk each night, but he's married now to an east coast wife. He was my brother beneath the shade of the July plum. There was no other who stood tall at the sound of the battle drums. Let in the ancient, let in the new. Let in the stars and the old country moon. Let in the ancient, let in the song. I know you can hear me - I believe you're still strong. We'd watch the sunrise at the intersection, buy apples at the grocery place. I hope he didn't sell the record collection... Maybe grew up or needed space? He's a working man, he's a midwest man. He don't take no shit, he don't need no hand. So I don't need him either- go on you ugly vagrant memory. Shameless deceiver. I remember back when he said to me: Let in the ancient, let in the new. Let in the stars and the old country moon. Let in the ancient, let in the song. I know you can hear me - I believe you're still strong. I believe we're two babies on a picnic blanket. I believe we're still boys at a work desk in summer. I believe we can build things, and chase things, and sweat, and when I'm drowning at the end I'll forget. He used to play guitar- no one could play that way. Such a sad, sad waste. It hurts me to this day.

There may never be another love like you for me- so I'll never say "I love you" again. Other girls I may see, some as pretty as can be- but I'll never say "I love you" again. Cuz when you left, you took my heart with you. And when you left, right from the start I knew, baby that I had to confess my unhappiness and that I'd never say "I love you" again.